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Considerations regarding children in divorce
Two factors continually show up in studies
on divorce, and these two factors
differentiate between the children who are
and are not damaged by divorce.
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Children and teens benefit from
maintaining the familial relationships
in their lives that were important and
meaningful to them prior to the divorce.
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Children and teens benefit when the
relationship between the parents is
supportive and cooperative.
Except
in cases of clear abuse or neglect, the
important question is not whether parents
should co-parent their children but how they
should do it.
The Key to Helping Your Kids
The best way for parents to help their
children through divorce is to pursue a
healthy divorce. Children of
divorce do well if their parents do well. If
a child is showing signs of difficulty,
parents should look at their own ability to
handle what is going on, and the subtle
messages they are sending to their children.
If necessary, slow things down and tone down
arguments and conflict. Research has
consistently shown that on-going parental
conflict is a strong predictor of emotional
and developmental problems in children.
If, at any time, you have any indication
that your child is suicidal, seriously
depressed, or engaging in any risky
behavior, refer them to a qualified child
therapist familiar with divorce-related
issues.
See our
"Useful Reading" page for recommended
books and articles. |
